An au pair is just as good as the relationship she has with her host family. Having an au pair can be an exciting experience, but it can also be a total disaster and disappointment if the family gets matched with the wrong girl. Therefore, the first step is to carefully interview all of the possible au pair candidates.
State the Expectations Clearly
If the expectations have been stated clearly in the application for an au pair, the family most probably will have been matched with candidates who meet the expectations. Now it is up to the family to find out which one would fit best. Make sure to review the au pair's application carefully and also check the references.
After selecting the possible candidates, schedule interviews with those shortlisted. Because it won't be possible to interview the au pair candidates face-to-face, schedule phone-interviews instead. To save money on the phone-bill consider using Skype or other video chat programs or Internet Telephony (IP).
Make sure to have at least 30 minutes to talk with the girl, to really find out about her personality. If her English is not that good yet, speak slowly and clearly. To let her warm up, start with asking a few things referring to her family and photos. Keep it simple at first. Ask her about her family and the things she likes to do in her spare time.
Don't Just Ask Yes-or-No Questions
Give her the chance to really tell you something about herself. Don’t just ask yes-or-no questions. Let her explain what she wants to get out of her year abroad. Talk to her about her long-term plans and about what she wants to do after her au pair year. Ask her, “Why did you decide to become an au pair?” and let her talk about her “experience with children.” Find out which chores she has to do at home and let her describe her room at home. Let her explain what she normally does during the day.
Make an Au-Pair Checklist
Once you find the au pair you like, you can send her your family profile, or photos and emails, which further strengthen the bond you have created. Write down any questions you might have based on the first interview. Also, make sure to include your expectations in your follow-up letter, meaning what you expect from the au pair and how it relates to her job responsibilities. Get your family together and jot down an “au pair checklist,” which might include the following:
- Does the family want a quiet girl, who likes to read a lot and stays in her room or a girl who is out and about?
- What kind of activities can the family organize for the au pair?
- Will the family take her on tours and day trips? Or should the au pair be independent in her spare time?
- How much does she have to drive? How often can she use your car for her personal use? Will she have her own car?
- Does she smoke? Does someone in the host-family smoke?
- Is she planning on inviting any visitors during her stay?
- Does she have any allergies (to cats, other animals)?
- Is she a vegetarian/vegan?
- Should she be fluent in English already?
- Should she teach the kids a foreign language, any other skills?
- Does she have to do homework, music practice, art, and sports with the kids?
- What will be the au pair’s job responsibilities? Be as specific as possible: Will she just do the children’s laundry, help with light housework, make the children’s beds, drive the kids after school to sports and other activities?
Be as Specific as Possible Regarding the Au Pair's Duties
Are there responsibilities the au pair might enjoy? Many girls like to cook and do the grocery shopping. And what do the kids enjoy? If they like to run around outside, hike in the woods and play soccer, the family probably does not want to choose a girl who doesn’t like the outdoors.?
What is the host family willing to offer the au pair? Examples are any kind of lessons on top of required college classes, a gym membership, a car to use, a cell phone, Internet and cable in her room, trips the family has planned during her stay, her room and bathroom situation.
What activities and the possibilities of meeting friends does the au pair have in the area? Are there other families with au pairs?
The more specific all those things are stated beforehand, the easier it will be for the family and the au pair to know if they are a good fit.
Stay in Touch With the Au Pair
When the right girl is finally found, always follow up with another, phone-call/interview. Invite the children to join in this conversation. If possible use Skype or any other video chat program. Most of those programs can be downloaded from the Internet for free. This way the children can see their new au pair and might even want to take her on a virtual tour through the house and show her what her room looks like.
By now the family probably has a very good feel about which au pair may be the right one. Make sure to stay in touch with her after the interview process to build the relationship even before she comes to stay. This way, the au pair will arrive a friend and not a stranger!
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Josefine Köhn-Haskins - Josefine Köhn-Haskins is an award winning journalist, author and correspondent.
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